I woke up today and realized my life revolves around college… I went to see some friends last night that I hadn’t seen in a while who just had prom. They were drinking and having so much fun. I had 2 beers because I have a math test Monday. What does drinking on a Friday have to do with a test at 4:45 on Monday? Don’t have time for fun if I have a test, I feel like I barely have the brain capacity to spend time with the love of my life. It’s like I have time, but I need to spend it doing something else. It feels like not only is my relationship suffering, but I’m suffering. I can’t remember a time I’ve been this depressed. I could sleep all day everyday if I had to chance. I can’t remember the last time Tyler and I had a conversation about anything relevant. Feels like I’m forcing my life in a direction that I know I want to go, but at what cost? Maybe I’m just going through something. Something permanent is more like it…. Maybe I’ll get over it.
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